Confessions of a Broke DC Girl Trying to Get Her Hair Done

Due to several terrifying and interconnected factors (an empty wallet, unemployment, and some newly dead dreams) the situation on top of my head was rapidly getting out of control. I was beginning to look like a method actress preparing for the lead role in the Anna Nicole Smith story. Minus the rich husband and stint with morbid obesity.

I normally take pride in my exceptionally good hair; I can’t help it. My hair is perfectly straight and shiny. It’s as soft as doll hair… no, softer. But lately my extremely restricted budget has been taking precedent over everything. And that includes my personal grooming needs.

See, it all started few weeks ago when tragedy struck after I decided to home highlight. I had done it before without any problems and thought this time would prove to be no exception. I was wrong. My dirty blonde hair was transformed white. Like ex-Playboy bunny with a drug problem white.

I so wish I could get my hands on the DeLorean to race back to that moment and yell, “stop!” right before the dye hit my hair.

So last week when I saw a Gilt City (yes, the very same company we featured here and here) daily coupon for full highlights at Urban Style Lab in Dupont Circle, I jumped at the chance to redeem my hair’s honor.

I made an appointment with Ashleah and biked on down to Urban Style. The place is in a townhouse’s basement right off the Circle on Connecticut (blink and you’ll miss it).

Ashleah came out and introduced herself. She then took me to sit in front of the most unflatteringly angled mirror of all time. She said she wanted to discuss my hair with me (a topic I actually consider quite boring, despite being the writer of this particular piece). While Ashleah droned on and on about “serious” dye bleeds, my thoughts became increasingly preoccupied by the Mirror of Evil. Why had no one ever told me my thighs roughly match Nova Scotia in circumference?

I was just planning my new Suzanne Somers exercise routine, when Ashleah’s voice harshly brought me back to the present. She said something disturbing, something I had not expected to hear for a very long time (or at least until bars stop regularly carding me). She said I needed to darken my hair color for “a more youthful appearance.”

 Awesome, I thought. I am 25 and strangers think I need a more youthful appearance. I am officially the Crypt Keeper.

Needless to say, my Urban Style hair experience was quickly becoming very depressing.

Urban Style is obviously meant for very rich people. And if you’re not rich at some point you will always betray that fact. Always. For me, it became obvious that I do not come from the land of milk and honey when I tried to refill my own water glass. The hairdresser actually laughed at me. The fact that I had my bike helmet with me probably didn’t help matters.

But Urban Style did manage to slightly redeem itself. After my hair consultation and water faux pas, I was taken to a nice little sitting area for the actual highlighting process. There were lots of trashy magazines to read and no scary mirrors to worry me. My only fears while flipping through the new People and Us Weekly were for Jennifer Aniston and her new boyfriend.

The entire highlighting process took almost four hours, but I am happy to report that my hair color is now officially called “butter cream.” I’m not sure if I can ever afford to go to Urban Style again without a Gilt coupon, but to give Ashleah credit where credit is due, my hair has never looked better. Or more spun with actual gold coins.

Rough approximation of me before


And as for that “more youthful” appearance?

I’m so proud to announce myself as the new face of Gap Kids. Thank you, Urban Style, thank you.

– A Can’t Wait for Sweet 16 Lindsay

About Lindsay Golder

Freelance writer, book-fiend, lover of shamefully bad films regularly featured on TBS or TNT.

2 Responses to “Confessions of a Broke DC Girl Trying to Get Her Hair Done”

  1. This was very entertaining! I’m glad you like your hair, and I did not mean to imply you looked like the Crypt Keeper. I meant that because you are young, and from your skin tone I thought that a golden tone was appropriate (as opposed to ash tones), but that did not mean you looked old. In any case, feel free to return anytime, and thank you for the compliment. I’m glad that you like your hair! -Ashleah

    • Thanks so much for checking out the blog and for your graciousness at the humor! Happy to report the hair still looks fantastic. If I do return I will make sure to ask for you.

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